so it's been a while since I posted something on here. I think this lack of blogging is due to several factors: (1) I haven't felt like posting anything (laziness); (2) I haven't really had anything extremely interesting to write about (boring life); (3) I haven't worked at the office as much which is where I usually do my blogging; and (4) I have been fairly busy. The countdown to Brasil is 6 days!! Honestly I can't believe it and at the present time I'm not overly excited due to being tired. I went to D.C. yesterday...more about that later, but that is the main reason I am tired. I think another reason I am tired, or at least feeling unmotivated is because of all the rain! I am very grateful for the beautiful day I had yesterday to take my lil road trip. It wasn't sunny but was overcast but at least it didn't rain!!!! But now it is raining....my cousin told me that someone else said that according to the "Farmer's Almanac" this summer is only suppose to consist of 11 days of sunshine, which is about 1 1/2 days of sunshine per each week of summer! That is depressing. I need sunshine. Also something that is ironic is that in Brasil they are having their rainy season! I know I'm not going down there for the weather, BUT it would be awesome to have just like 3 whole days rain-free. It is slightly assuring to know that the last time my church sent a team to Brasil during the rainy season they said it didn't rain very much at all. I'm a lil skeptical about this trip just because of how the weather is here, but I know God will work it all out!
Hello Sunshine! I have had 2 days of being able to sit outside in the blissful sun. It's true, you really don't know the value of something until it's gone...or shielded by clouds, whatever the case may be. It's just humorous how people, human beings are control freaks and in the case of the weather, we can not control it (at least not yet anyway). When it rains on Memorial Day, we are forced to have our picnics and cookouts inside and readjust. That is how I am trying to see my life right now, like a rained out BBQ. I have plans and I am expecting good weather, but come the day of my cookout, my expectant sunshine is a no show and is replaced with storm clouds, so I readjust. Right now it seems like my cookout is getting rained out before it even happens, if that makes a shred of sense. I am going somewhere with this. My point is my plans for my life, my desires and hopes will not always be met the way I want them to be met, but God is in control. Trials I have are merely readjustments I need to make in my life. Disappointments and let downs will come when I rely on people, it's to be expected. But, praise God that when people fail me He is still faithful and I can trust Him to be there always. It's good to remind myself of this before the rain comes. I hope it is an encouragement to you too.
Hey I've heard this song everywhere "Run" by a band named Kutless. I was listening to it wondering what it was about, so I looked up the lyrics, and it's sung from the perspective of God and it does contain truth. Here are the lyrics:
Why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know i
just, just want to be with you, to be with you
Looking down from above as you watch TV
Wondering why, oh you're ignoring me
Do you remember, remember when i came to you
And you loved me
And i'm waiting for you
And i'm waiting for you
Why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know i
just, just wanna be with you, to be with you
Hey, why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know
I just, just wanna be with you, to be with you...
Whatever happened to the love, the love you had for me
When you first came to me
Don't you know that i died, died so i could be with you
forever
And i'm waiting for you
And i'm waiting for you
Why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know i
just, just wanna be with you, to be with you
Hey, why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know
I just, just wanna be with you, to be with you...
Find a place of solitude, and i'll speak to you
As you pray to me
Don't you know i'm waiting here, waiting for you to
read and hear my words
I'm waiting here missing the time the times we shared
oh, please come to me
Why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know i
just, just wanna be with you, to be with you
Hey, why do you run why do you hide oh don't you know
I just, just wanna be with you, to be with you...
Things I don't know how to do but want to know how to do:
* Learn or at least understand HTML so I can make this page better (get my comments to work!!!!)
* Learn another language (Portuguese! Notice that my dates are now in Portuguese)
* Play a musical instrument (I'm sorta learning handchimes but that doesn't count, but I want to play the guitar)
* Walk the runway so I can be "America's Next Top Model" (just kidding!)
* Learn more about Photography so I can actually know what I'm doing
Stuff I know how to do but don't do as much as I would like to, so I actually want to do more this summer:
* Read the Bible more and memorize more of it
* Read more in general (Lord of the Rings trilogy)
* Write letters and keep in contact with those who don't live near me or I see that often
* Write more in general (journaling--it's a therapy)
* Pray
* Travel travel travel! (I love roadtrips)
* Meet new people
* Spend time with my grandparents on the farm
* Do something with my scrapbooks
* Enjoy the great outdoors (when will this rain stop?!)
well, that's all I can think of now, BUT you all need to keep me accountable and ask me if I am actually doing this stuff!
There's a place in the darkness I use to cling to. That presses harsh hope against time. In the absence of martyrs there's a presence of thieves who only want to rob you blind. They steal away any sense of peace, tho I'm a king. I'm a king on my knees. And I know hey are wrong when they say I am strong. As the darkness covers me. So I turn on the light and reveal all the glory, I am not afraid. To
bear all my weakness, knowing in meekness, I have a kingdom to gain. Where there is peace and Love in the Light in the Light, I am not afraid. To let your light shine bright in my life In my life. There are ghosts from my past who have owned more of my soul. Than I thought I had given away. They linger in closets and under my bed. And in pictures less proudly dis-played. A great fool in my Life I
have been. Have squandered til pallid and thin. Hung my head in shame and refused to take blame. From darkness I know I've let win. Can you hear me? can you hear me?
"martyrs and theives " Jennifer Knapp
this is probably going to be a boring entery because I am at "work" and I am bored. And if you can even read this, it means that my blog isn't completely messed up. Anyway, back to the "work" it's boring, but don't get that confused with me being ungrateful for the job. Is there any such thing as having the "dream job"? Please tell me if you have yours. I think my dream job would entail actually doing something I enjoy that actually helps others. I'm finding it's hard to actually help others and enjoy it. I know I'm not looking for fame and fortune, so I know my dream job is not being a celebrity or anything like that. So what jobs could I do that I would enjoy and actually help people.....hmmm....well I've always wanted to be a roadie for one of my favorite bands. Touring would be awesome because I love to travel and I don't think I'd mind setting up and working merch, cause I'd be helping people, if that makes sense. So if there are anyone reading this that can hook me up with this, that would be cool. I'm not saying this is my life's ambition, but it'd be a cool job for a lil bit, not forever.
I must get back to "work" and then get my shots for Brazil! Yeah Brazil, No shots!
I am known for my delayed reactions. It takes me a while to get things and sometimes I'm just not that bright. This, let's call a "condition", has spread into other areas of my life, such as being in the know about current events and entertainment. It's not entirely my fault because I do live a sheltered life when I am at school and rarely, if ever, watch TV or listen to the radio or pick up a newspaper. Occasionally I do check out the news while I am on-line, but usually just whatever pops up in the IM or MSN messenger box. However, I am home now and have access to all the modern conveniences of life that keep me in tune with what's going on, including music. As lame as it seems, I just "discovered" a new, well sorta new, band called "Brave Saint Saturn". Any Five Iron Frenzy fan who listens to the CD will quickly recognize the voice of Reese Roper singing, yes singing, about serious stuff. There's a bunch of other FIF members adding their talent to Brave Saint Saturn, but not the horn section, because this isn't a ska band, but what is being called "space rock." It's kind of like FIF (minus the horns) meets Joy Electric, but with a lil less electric (and sometimes joy). I know some FIF or JE or even BSS fan would kill me for making that comparison but it's the best I can describe them, and I like it. Brave Saint Saturn is just the thing for the kids who grew up listening to FIF and have mellowed out a bit, kinda like myself. And even though FIF is calling it quits at the end of this year, that void can find some filling knowing that the members haven't quit making music and Reese is still singing his heart away, though about more profound things then "kitty doggy". And as much as I love "kitty doggy" and "when I go out" and "kingdom of the dinosaurs," I am really digging how he sings about his own need for Jesus Christ, it puts music and words to the vulnerability I know I sometimes feel as a Christian.
Well, as I said, I am just "discovering" Brave Saint Saturn and been listening to their first album "So Far From Home." I came on-line to learn more about them and found out they have another CD out, "The Light of Things Hoped For" and I can't wait to get a listen of that. Here's a page you can check them out at http://www.bravesaintsaturn.com/band.cfm and I'll be posting more info as I find it out. I know it's hard to say good bye to Five Iron Frenzy, but at least we can say hello Brave Saint Saturn. Yeah, it’s a delayed “hello” on my part.
