domingo, fevereiro 23, 2003
there is this thing i cannot obtain
on the teter-totar of my life
I am reaching for the middle
to be in balance
having all things in harmony
and it's not by blind faith i am grasping
because i have seen balance
I pass it each time
I go to one extreme or the other
but still I am left grasping
as I collide with a new challenge
and try to make a u-turn
running back to the other end
when I am at top speed I see it
the middle where I want to be
and I can't stop
I try to but end up triping
falling
rolling to the other end
of my own extremes
i am happy
or depressed
the inbetween has become almost unknow to me
almost...
in either extreme there should still be consistency
consistent joy
that comes from a faithful
consistent
God
when I grasp for Him
I grasp for a world of perfect balance
= + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = + = +
that poem might be continued....
or it might not
so that's my deal.
This weekend I didn't practice much balance of my time, I pretty much spent it doing most of the same thing. And this really bugs me because I know there is so much stuff I really wanted to do or needed to do. so I am now going to go do what I need to do--homework. It's gotta come into play sometime. But I'd rather play....
quinta-feira, fevereiro 20, 2003
yes I am a slacker....blogging has become a burden to my soul...but I want to keep this active to my faithful readers...if there are any...so I will not disappoint you, I am posting something my friend Darla sent me. She's really encouraging with her e-mails of what she is learning in her life...so here is one...enjoy and tell me what you think!
*In the garden of Eden Satan Focused on 1 negative & Eve forgot God's
GENEROSITY & GRACE
**************************************************
How often this is true of me. That really hit me this weekend. Some rough things happened & it is so easy for me to focus on those things and forget the good-amazing good things that had happened to me during this time. If I took the time to count these good things, I couldn't finish for they go on an on. The privelage to just live, breath, see snow, being able to fellowship with other Christians. May I not forget to remember God's grace. I pray each one of you will daily recount God's grace in your life, for when we do that, we can be nothing but joyful, no matter what God brings into our lives.
*If you doubt God's goodness
you
will not want to change.
You'll be convinced that God wants to rob you
rather than enrich you.
How do I doubt God's Goodness to me?
===============================
Let's pursue righteousness in the midst of hard times!
Here are some of the many things God promises the righteous:
1. Tongue is choice silver
Prov 10:20
The tongue of the righteous is choice silver,
but the heart of the wicked is of little value.
2. Desire will be granted**see note
Prov 10:24
What the wicked dreads will overtake him;
what the righteous desire will be granted.
3. Prospect is joy
Prov 10:28
The prospect of the righteous is joy,
but the hopes of the wicked come to nothing.
4. Safe
Prov 18:10
The name of the LORD is a strong tower;
the righteous run to it and are safe.
5. Bold as a lion
Prov 28:1
The wicked man flees though no one pursues,
but the righteous are as bold as a lion.
6. Hears their prayer
Prov 15:29
The LORD is far from the wicked
but he hears the prayer of the righteous.
**Lord, remind us that as we chose to follow Your ways, as we pursue righteousness-things may not go as we think they should-in those moments remind us Your time table is best, You want what is best for us, and these struggles are proof that you are working in us, for the devil is not leaving us alone.
2 Cor 6:4-10
Rather, as servants of God
(1 commited to obeying God~this is what I am)
we commend ourselves in every way:
in great endurance;
in troubles,
hardships and distresses;
in beatings,
imprisonments and riots;
in hard work,
sleepless nights and hunger;
in purity,
(is my lifestyle pure, free of known sin?)
understanding,
patience and kindness;
in the Holy Spirit
and in sincere love;
(seeking the highest good in others, others not me, selfless)
in truthful speech
and in the power of God;
with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left;
(Does the Word of God affect all aspects of my life~what a powerful weapon?)
through glory and dishonor,
bad report and good report;
genuine,
yet regarded as impostors;
known,
(by Christ-the only person I truly need to be known by)
yet regarded as unknown;
dying,
and yet we live on;
beaten,
and yet not killed;
sorrowful,
yet always rejoicing;
(eternity in mind)
poor,
yet making many rich;
(thru Jesus Christ)
having nothing,
(by world's standards)
and yet possessing everything.
As I look upon this verse, I see so many ways to change. I praise God for the grace He gives in convicting our hearts, showing us our sin, and then allowing us to change.
Keeping eternity in mind,
Darla
terça-feira, fevereiro 18, 2003
Christ has set us free to live a free life. So take your stand! Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you.
I suspect you would never intend this, but this is what happens. When you attempt to live by your own religious plans and projects, you are cut off from Christ, you fall out of grace. Meanwhile we expectantly wait for a satisfying relationship with the Spirit. For in Christ, neither our most conscientious religion nor disregard of religion amounts to anything. What matters is something far more interior: faith expressed in love.
You were running superbly! Who cut in on you, deflecting you from the true course of obedience? This detour doesn't come from the One who called you into the race in the first place. And please don't toss this of as insignificant. It only takes a minute amount of yeast, you know, to permeate an entire loaf of bread. Deep down, the Master has given me confidence that you will not defect. But the one who is upsetting you, whoever he is, will bear the divine judgement.
It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure you don't use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that's how freedom grows. For everything we know about God's Word is summed up in a single sentence: Love others as you love yourself. That's an act of true freedom.
My counsel is this: Live freely, animated and motivated by God's Spirit. Then you won't feed the compulsions of selfishness. For there is a root of sinful self-interest in us that is at odds with a free spirit, just as the free spirit is incompatible with selfishness. These two ways of life are antithetical, so that you cannot live at times one way and at times another way according how you feel on any given day. Why don't you choose to be led by the Spirit and so escape the erratic compulsions of a law-dominated existence?
--an except from Paul's letter the the Galatian churches (5:1, 4-14, 16-18, The Message)
as far as me: no comment
pride amounts to nothing when no one cares
quinta-feira, fevereiro 13, 2003
I can do no more justice to the awesome wonder-filled theme called love than a child can grasp a star. Still by reaching toward the star the child may call attention to it and even indiate the direction one might look to see it. So, as I stretch my heart toward the high, shining love of God, someone who has not before known about it may be encouraged to look up and have hope.
AW Tozer "Knowledge of the Holy"
Tomorrow is Valentine's Day--a holiday/celebration thingy that I am really indifferent about. I'm not for it, yet I am not against. I'm not wearing black, neither am I am wearing the traditional red. I'm not getting a rose, neither giving one. The only card I have gotten was from my grandma and the only candy was from some nice old people at church, and I am perfectly content with that. I found some cool verses today that sort of have a "valentiny" theme.
Psalm 85:7, 10-12a
Show us your unfailing love, O Lord, and grant us your salvation...
Love and faithfulness meet together; righteousness and peace kiss each other.
Faithfulness springs forth from the earth, and righteousness looks down from heaven.
The Lord will indeed give what is good...
Hmmm...hmmm....think on these things, and be encouraged, even if you don't have a valentine and have a very busy day tomorrow of tests and work! We will endure!
segunda-feira, fevereiro 10, 2003
wow....you just think it's gonna be a normal, blah blah monday, and out of no where it turns out to be a spiritual landmark of sorts. All that you prayed for, to be different, comes crashing through and there is a renewel within your spirit. No, no one can see it, at least right now, but you can feel it....a burden lifted--one you didn't even know you had, a freedom is there....soon people will see....you trust, you pray, you hope that God will be seen now....down came the walls....everything feel down....that's when the clouds parted and the sun shone through...
brokeness is a good thing....
more later....
quinta-feira, fevereiro 06, 2003
I am a slacker on this thing...o well...and the comments, yeah, they aren't working, despite my many attempts to try and make them work....
I had a birthday on Monday and honestly it was the best birthday ever, thanks to my wonderful roomie Kim. It was non-stop craziness and fun, as opposed to last year when I did nothing. I was just so surprised that people would make such a big deal, I didn't expect anything--like last year--but it was everything but boring, made me forget that I was getting so old. I don't feel any older, just more tired....not any more mature, that's for sure, (I have the pictures to prove it!). But God is really good, just the blessing of friendship, being cared for....that spurns me to want to be more of a friend and caring of others. It was an uplifting day...I needed it a lot.
I don't know what else to write....I have a lot of work to do, but no motivation or time to do it...but I know God will help me to do it....
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